Love is Love


One of the things I’ve alway struggle with in life is not being liked especially by my family. I’ve always worried that something I do will make them not like me and I’ve mainly outgrown that but theres still that part in me that seeks their love. Making a choice conscious of something that they…

The Hard Stuff Pt2


“Just endure it, you can do it. One day you won’t have to and that’s what’s important.” Something I would often say to myself when I was younger living with my stepdad. Endure it. I’ve always loved my momma but her choice of husband for 20 years I didn’t love. My stepdad spent a good…

The Hard Stuff to Write


The Hard Stuff to Write Part One I’ve felt like a lot of my life growing up was just me being yelled at, over nothing. It seemed like I was just and easy target to pick on and to take one’s anger out on. Maybe it was because I’ve always been to scared to fight…

Just 22


With my current job comes difficulties that I never thought that’d I’d have to face. I am 22 years old and I am 5 years younger then person closest to my age, everyone else is at least 10 years older than me. With being the youngest person there, especially being in my early 20’s, my…

Finding Inspiration in Everyday


I find that I draw inspiration/happiness from so many things everyday. It’s something that I come to look forward to every time I wake up. (well after the shock of annoyance when the alarm goes off) I can pretty much find inspiration in anything from trees to a quote to a shirt. Right now I’m…

Sometimes I’m Not okay 


Sometimes I’m not okay, and I so wish someone would see I’m not okay but here’s the thing about that. I try not to show when we’re not okay we hid it and so I can’t be mad or sit around going I want someone to see that I’m not okay. Unless I’m willing to let them see that part of…

Thantophobia


Thantophobia (n.) the phobia of losing someone you love I keep having these two reccuring nightmares of different people in my family dying. It sucks, loads. It takes some of the most important people to me and then rips them from me, yes it’s just a dream but it feels so real when it’s happening…

They’re great


Since I was little I’ve looked up to three males in my life, there are my grandpa, uncle and big brother. Is it strange to have some of most important role models in my life are three males? I’m not sure but I do know I’ve learned some very important lessons from them. My grandpa…

I miss….


I miss many people and even things. Some in the normal you’re not here and others in the you’re gone sense. My best friend lives 1,642.3 miles away, I miss my cousin who died, I miss my old friend, I miss reading and I miss getting good sleep. Some of these may seem silly and…

Having to be an introvert?


I am most defiantly a extrovert, I love being with people and talking with people. I love listening and learning about people. It’s hard for me to think about being put somewhere where I won’t have much “people” time. For me being with people is everything, it lets me be me. Being an extrovert I love…

Proving my worth


Recently I’ve been feeling like I have to constantly prove myself to people. I feel like I shouldn’t have to. We were having a family birthday party on Sunday and I was tempted to not go because part of my family makes me feel like I have to constantly prove my worth to them. It feels…

Every Other Thursday


“Oh no! Mother’s Day is soon!” I said out loud, instead to myself. My mom overheard me and told me that she would love a blog post dedicated to her, so here it is. (early, sorry mom!) This is for my wonderful and somehow patience mother!  Every other Thursday day I love my mom, or…